This is my farewell post from the Twittersphere, it’s been on my mind for a while now and I’ve now come to the full decision.
But before I go, I want to leave this post. As a possible explanation, but also to show other men, the errors of my ways and maybe I can help a few more people on my way out.
Here’s my piece.
Twitter feels like a collection of the “cool kids” who always “won” at life. That’s at least how people portray themselves, but there’s no depth to that and when it comes to improving your own life, you need that depth. A man needs to have a mentor, or someone he looks up to that is relatable. He needs someone that shows him that what he is going through is normal and he’s not weird for having to go through it. No one wants to talk about failures, no one wants to talk about sadness, depression, or anything, which are the cold hard roller coasters in life.
Twitter is a high-light reel.
“CRUSH IT
LIFT BRO
BRO JUST NEXT HER
WE ALL LEVELING UP
CONQUER WE CONQUERORS WE GOING TO CONQUER
DONT SHOW WEAKNESS, CRUSH YOUR WEAKNESS”
Which is GREAT, seriously, improving your life is great however, it’s not relatable to the guys in the gutter. It feels good, but for these guys, it just reads fake.
I’ll be honest here; I feel this way because I haven’t had a great life. Picked on when I was younger then something happened in highschool that was out of my control and fucked me up more. Out of highschool, struggle. Struggle. Then I moved away, hustled on the streets of Montreal selling fake products to make living. Slept outside at times. I remember I was so broke, I was laying in the grass of a park watching the sun go down, thinking that this is what being homeless was like. I lived in my van last year for 4 months during the winter.
Cold hard fact, is that I never really succeeded in anything yet.
Have I had the hardest life?
Nope.
But I haven’t had it easy.
And because of this, the whole mindset on Twitter is not relatable. You look at people succeeding and wonder if you’re the odd man out. Are you just destined for mediocrity? If no one wants to talk about the darker side of life, then how are you supposed to genuinely learn from these people?
What men need, are not these people who are so full of themselves that they genuinely think they are God (Rubi for example). Men need to see guys who have struggled, who have come from shit circumstances and made it work.
These thoughts have been on my mind for a while and everything came together tonight. It came together while I was watching a few documentaries on successful men that I knew went through a lot of shit in life. These are the types of guys who quite literally came from the bottom and were awkward, weird kids in school “outcasts”.
You might know one of them, he goes by the name of Rocky or Rambo. Yes, Sylvester Stallone grew up as a weird kid, an outcast who had a speech impediment and was incredibly shy. He used to get made fun of because of his name Sylvester, so he used to go by the name of Binky which worked for a bit but then the kids came up with a rhyme with the word Stinky. Stinky Binky. Then in the beginning of highschool Sylvester went by Mike, which worked for a while until the kids found out his real name and he was teased again.
Skipping forward a few years, Sylvester was living in Hollywood, so broke that he almost had to sell his dog Butkus (who’s the dog in Rocky) just to make rent. He lived in quite literally a one-room shack. One single room, which included everything. Kitchen, bedroom, bathroom.
It’s men like that, that are relatable. Especially to guys like myself, who have struggled almost their entire life. Plenty of successful people, were weird/awkward growing up and struggled a large part of their lives.
Another guy that is thought highly of not only on Twitter, but by the rest of the world, going by the name of Hugh Hefner had a similar struggle growing up. He didn’t lose his virginity until he was 22 and was an awkward, shy kid who grew up with Puritan parents. He learned romance through watching plenty of movies.
You know how many guys on Twitter would willingly admit not losing it till 22?
Probably none.
Fake.
Fake.
Twitter is fake. It’s not real. It’s a place to flex. It’s not a place to genuinely find role models. Twitter is just like Instagram, a highlight reel.
Why do you think I got so much flack for what I wrote about hating myself?
People who I had interacted with, blocked me. Some people straight up said that I was acting like a loser. (I should also thank the people who did reach out, and wanted to help).
They reacted this way because for 90% of the people in our Twittersphere, they can’t relate to that feeling. They can’t relate to picking up a knife, in the middle of the night and wondering what it would be like to just slit your wrists, wondering how painful it would be. Or what it’s like to have every single one of your friends turn on you and become enemies over a simple misunderstanding. Or hating school so much, that you dread everyday, then when school is over for the day and you’re on you’re way home you dread going home because of how much your parents fight, wishing that the bus broke down so you could get a few more hours of peace.
I’m not saying ALL OF Twitter isn’t able to relate, but certainly a large chunk.
Speaking of relatable, another aspect of that I’ve learned to dislike about Twitter is if you spend enough time on the app you start to only feel like you can only really connect with people from the app.
“Woke” people.
“Red Pill” people.
You only connect with other like-minded minds on Twitter, which is fine but that world is such a small part of the real world and if you don’t want to live primarily in an online world you’re going to struggle connecting with anyone offline.
Here’s an example.
How can you expect to be an artist, if the only people you want to hang-out with are the ones who are “woke”. Good luck finding that and to be honest, a lot of the “woke” concepts on Twitter are just fucking stupid.
Fruit is bad?
Smoking is GOOD?
Alcohol should be cut entirely out of your life?
Yosemite is going to blow up?
Epistein this, epistein that.
This place is so fucked up, that people literally look up to psychopaths and sociopaths. Does no one realize, that behaving this way is NOT a good thing?
You know how fucked up some of this shit is?
Is there really a single person in your community, that you can relate to when this is how you think?
Not really.
It’s no wonder, that most accounts on Twitter, make their money primarily THROUGH Twitter because that’s the only place where they have an audience.
Some people can live in that online world, and be fine and I can’t say I haven’t met some cool people off Twitter (Dave, Wes, Rob, Sotiris, Kaz, Etc) ironically these are all guys who hardly spend time online to begin with. But as for the rest of Twitter, I don’t want to be a Twitter superstar. I don’t want to be able to only connect with “woke” people, which is how I am starting to feel.
SachsJunior and I have been talking about this a lot. There’s no depth on Twitter and for the guy who doesn’t want to live strictly in an online world, who has only online friends, Twitter is largely a dead-end. A real larger than life playboy, doesn’t have much use for Twitter, unless it’s business related.
Here’s another example of how wrong Twitter can get things.
A lot of guys talk shit about books, and brag how they don’t read, they’re too busy taking action.
BUT.
Ironically, many of the “playboys” who people look up to, were AVID readers. Connery, AVID reader. Flynn AVID reader. Picasso AVID reader (little known fact). Part of being a playboy, is being CULTURED and that comes from READING.
But I digress.
I have no business interests on Twitter and I don’t care to create any. I don’t find the content motivational because there’s no depth and I also don’t want to become the type of person who only has online friends. Fuck that.
I have no need for it anymore.
Which is why I’m leaving.
Once this post goes up, I will change the password to my Twitter account to something random and I will lock myself out. I won’t delete my account, nor will I deactivate. I still want people to enjoy what I did put out there and to find my blog.
So where can you find me? Well, I’ll still post to this blog and there’s my instagram jason.coull but that’s about it. Maybe I will start the email list again. I’m not sure but for now, that’s where you can find me. I refuse to live in an online world and I won’t.
Delacroix's Desk 
Hey brother, I hope this finds you well. Sounds like you and I are on the same wavelength–the last blog I wrote was about fakers and frauds in the manosphere (https://redpilldad.blog/2020/07/08/fraudsters-fakers-and-the-difference-between-positive-and-toxic-masculinity/), and yet, not surprisingly, the guys who are the bullshit artists continued to bullshit. Not that I really expected any other result, but it makes me ponder a lot of the things you’ve expressed above.
I may continue to stay on Twitter, but I share you view that it’s mostly garbage–guys are out there claiming to constantly get laid by young and hot, making millions, and everything about their life is a win. I want to assure that all those guys–nearly 100% of them–are liars.
No one wins all the time. No one goes through life and has zero struggles. That’s just not how it works. And I agree with you that for a lot of guys out there–particularly young men who are struggling to be successful with women or with their financial situation or their mission–being told by all these other guys that the answer is as simple as, “LIFT!” and “Stop being a pussy!” is fucking retarded.
I’m actually going to write my next blog on the topic that getting laid is HARD. It’s not easy. For most guys, in most situations. Dating apps don’t work very well, and even though we speculate they might work well for super good looking guys, I’m not even sure that’s the truth. On top of that, chicks today are so super flaky and flighty, it’s nearly impossible to rely on your leads. Most guys I know who are getting laid regularly, work VERY hard to do so. Anyway, I’ll spell it out in the longer post.
I respect your decision to leave Twitter. If you ever need any help or advice, shoot me an email or comment on my blog and I’ll get back to you. For now, good luck and God speed. You’re a talented guy, and in the end you’ll be just fine.
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I read that post, great post man. You really hit it on the head. Twitter is full of so many fakers and bullshit artist, that the guys who genuinely want to improve find it very hard, These guys aren’t leaders, they aren’t conquerors (most). I’m looking forward to the blog post (as I do with most of your content), I don’t know if getting laid is HARD but it’s not easy, like you said.
I always have had the mindset that if you want to get laid often, you need the lifestyle to back it up. The 29 year old coder guy (extreme example) is just not going to have the lifestyle to pull often. Girls, whether we want to admit it is a lifestyle choice, which is why guys like Nathan Alexander have the set-up they do, he’s a photographer, he’s very good at it and he does boudoir shoots. His lifestyle is naturally going to put him in front of a ton of girls.
To a larger extent, this is what Hugh Hefner did. He wanted to be a playboy, so he made a brand and lifestyle based on that whole idea. Obviously, he always had girls around as a result.
But if you’re just a regular guy, who has an average life-style you’re going to struggle. Especially if you can’t approach.
I look forward to your post brother and thank you for the kind words.
🙂
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Leave your Twitter up, but just don’t use it apart from having your blog posts publish to it automatically. Some guys do use Twitter to track blogs and other writing… so it has some utility in that respect.
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I really like this idea, that way people can still enjoy my content, just without having to be active on Twitter.
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That was my original twitter plan but clearly I’m a hypocrite
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We must be on the same wavelength, cause I’ve been feeling the same lately. There are definitely some positive leaning accounts in that sphere, but a lot of it is dominated by dishonest people compensating for something. I’m gonna take your suggestion and read up on some more actual, successful people, rather than reading Twitter. I’ve also felt recently what you mentioned about not being able to relate to real people as a result of this sphere. Almost psy-op ish, in a way.
Your account, and Goldmund’s, were among the few I could relate to, especially being an artist myself. You helped me figure out a lot of stuff the past year, and helped set me on a better path. Thank you, and best of luck on your own path.
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I’ve always been a catalyst for change, I wouldn’t be surprised if other people started to leave Twitter and stick to their blogs. I definitely suggest looking up real, successful people. As you do this, you will find a lot of common “sense” on Twitter is not as smart as people think it is. You’ll see a different way of succeeding in life, by people that actually succeeded.
I always have the notion, would I rather learn from someone who had a net worth of $4B (Ross Perot) or some guy on Twitter who sells a course and claims to make 10k a month.
Kind of an easy decision.
If you want to be the best, you need to learn from the best.
I’m happy that my work and words resonate with you, Goldmund and I are friends, so it doesn’t surprise me that my and his work is relatable. I learned a lot from him. 🙂
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100% man. Plenty of the theories on there are great for initial growth, and breaking out of mental boxes. Past a certain point however, you get trapped again (The stoicism vs vulnerability debate for example. The truth tends to be more towards the center). Certainly appreciate what I have gotten out of it, but time to move on.
With regards to successful idols, I remember you being a big fan of McQueen, Senna, and Picasso. I’ve heard of a Senna documentary floating around, but do you have any recommendations to learn more about these guys? I see a lot of material but don’t know what is the best.
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I love the enthusiasm man, definitely sounds like it’s time to move on and make it permanent, we’re all looking to grow and there are times where you need to close chapters of your life, for new things to happen.
New plants can’t grow if you don’t plant new seeds.
In regards to successful people, here are some of my personal favorite recommendations and best ways to learn about the 3 you listed. (the list MAY be long)
Aryton Senna
Ahh Senna. This man was magnificent.
To answer your question right away,
The most accessible is the one titled SENNA 2011.
This is the one that I first watched, then I went down the rabbit hole and found others.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yHOjP8nxuac (parts are not in English)
And then these two videos, which aren’t documentaries but they’re so brilliant I am going to list them. They are more montages, but brilliantly edited.
(short, 7 minutes)
(It’s 44 minutes and it’s an AMAZING montage documentary. It just fires you up, perfect to listen to during a work-out or just in the background (but I recommend to watch the video at least once)
Now let’s move on to books.
The Life Of Senna by Tom Rubython (This book is the most intimate look into Senna’s life I have come across, it talks about his relationship, growing up, the models he dated and he charmed them, how he looked at “winning” and even spiritual stuff like out-of-body experiences when he is racing. He said he get’s so far in the zone, that he starts racing at a level that he can’t even fathom. His biggest interest in racing is hitting that red-line of focus, where he’s just on the cusp of losing control, but he’s not.
This is Senna’s famous lap where he passed the redline and was driving subconcious. He was 55 SECONDS ahead of the second placed car and his crew told him he was going TOO FAST and that he needed to SLOW DOWN. The minute he was told to slow down, he crashed. This is the video of the lap, it’s a work of art.
One last thing about Senna, is that the day before he died he opened up his Bible and the passage he opened to said “That God would give him the greatest of all gifts, which is God Himself.” and he died later that day.
Senna was on another level, he wasn’t just an athlete he was a master of the subconscious. He had an ability to focus and go inside himself that very, very few people have.
Now I know you asked about Senna but I thought I’d add some personal recommendations about Steve McQueen and Picasso as well, these recommendations should help give you a better understanding of these men and just why they were so masculine and special. None of this is surface level stuff, it’s all deep and if you go through all of the recommendations you will have a terrific idea of what true masculinity is and how it’s portrayed. Both from the artist level with Picasso and the more down to earth, physical level of McQueen.
Let’s start.
Steve McQueen.
The Man And Le Mans – Trailer
This is probably the BEST way to understand McQueen (providing you have an interest in auto-racing) and you should also watch his movie “Le Mans” before you watch this to get a better understanding because The Man And Le Mans is a documentary on how Steve McQueen filmed his movie “Le Mans” , and it goes into the filming process, McQueen himself and his life during that time. Essentially this documentary shows you how McQueen thought, the way he approached problems and how he absolutely pushed thing to the MAX including people and equipment, to get what he wanted. I still remember the parts where they talked about how when they filmed Le Mans, McQueen and the other drivers weren’t going to use any motion picture trick to emulate speed, they actually drove at race-speeds and the one guy crashed, almost died (I think he almost died, regardless, there was a crash).
To get the scenes he wanted for Le Mans, McQueen had to create a new camera system that he could mount to the cars because there was nothing available at the time to do what he wanted.
A VERY driven man.
Other good docs on McQueen
Books
https://www.amazon.com/My-Husband-Friend-Memoir/dp/1425918182 (Memoirs written from the perspective of his first wife.)
https://www.amazon.com/Steve-McQueen-Last-Mile-Revisited/dp/1854432559 (A photo type book from his last wife, Barbara Minty. These photos and the stories are from McQueen’s last decade of living, where he mainly retreated to a simple life. Riding bikes, traveling across the US in a beat up old truck. Arguably, this is the true McQueen. He didn’t really like the Hollywood stuff.)
Films (Of course)
Papillon 1973 (His BEST film IMO. This is a more serious film than his others, his acting is BRILLIANT and the story is just incredible. This is one of those films you watch and after you are so inspired to take risks. It’s a very strong portrayal of masculinity from a strictly male perspective (there’s hardly any girls in it).
Le Mans 1971 (If you enjoy auto-racing, WATCH THIS FILM. If you don’t enjoy racing, don’t bother. This is one of the best portrayals of what it is like to be a race car driver, it’s intense, moving and utterly exhilarating but there’s no real plot. Guys who love speed, will instantly feel what McQueen was trying to capture with the film. Even though he didn’t direct or produce it, this was McQueen baby.)
The Getaway 1972 (One of my favorite action films, McQueen plays the part brilliantly. It’s a love-story but not a generic, run of the mill one. There’s a lot of Red Pill truths in it and it’s very “real” , it’s violent, masculine and raw. One of my favorite action films of all time. I watch it atleast four times a year and Ali MacGraw is in this one, she’s so fucking hot. You’ll know what I mean, when you start to watch it. Hot, but with an edge.)
Thomas Crown Affair 1968 (Another great love story with Red Pill truths, there’s a good amount of action in this one but it’s mainly about the main character (Steve) and his other interests (girls), it has a brilliant ending and there’s a chess scene that perfectly captures the masculine and feminine dynamic.
Bullitt 1968 (Classic, classic movie. It has the best car chase scene of all time. The scene was shot all in one take and McQueen actually was driving, there was no stunt man for many of the shots. This film really shows what a man who is suave, together and takes no prisoners looks like.)
The Great Escape 1963 (This is a MANS FILM. There are NO GIRLS in this one and it just OOZES masculinity. If you were to look at what a man is supposed to be like, you could choose anyone of the characters from this film. Brotherhood, toughness, breaking rules (for the greater good), holding frame, playing it cool under pressure, it’s all in here. One of the best films of all time, IMO.)
Other notables.
Love With A Proper Stranger (I haven’t seen this one, but I just found out about it now. This looks really good, really good, I’ll add my notes once I watch it but I can just tell, it’s good. This film is a lot “softer” before McQueen got type-casted as an action type guy. A more vulnerable side of him is shown here.
Never Love A Stranger 1958 (Tough film to find, though I could send it over if you wanted. It’s black and white and is one of Steve earliest performances. It’s a great film about being a player, seduction and romance but not in a cheesy way, but also not in a suave way either. It’s very real. Very, very real in the way the emotions are portrayed.)
Next-up Picasso.
Picasso is a largely misunderstood man, documentaries don’t do him justice. To really “get” him and to feel inspired by him, you have to search out the memoirs and the rare books about him.
Thankfully, I’ve done the work for you :).
If you want to learn more about Picasso, these are the books you want.
Conversations with Picasso by Brassai (Intimate conversations with his friend Brassai, topics range from art, to war, to creativity, sex, masculinity. It’s GOOD. Really good. One of my favorite paragraphs is where Picasso talks about observing animals and how they court one another and how sex is literally everywhere.)
A Life Of Picasso Volume 1 by John Richards (The best biography, it’s HUGE. First volume is like 700 pages, with illustrations and sketches. It has so much content in it. John was one of Picasso’s great friends, so this is another intimate look it also de-bunks a lot of Picasso’s famous sayings. Picasso was known to aggrandize and Richards frequently questions these sayings. Like for example, Picasso claims he never learned to write or read in school but Richards shows a surviving exam that Picasso took when he was 10 or so and the writing was great. It really helps humanize the man and make it him more relatable. But there’s SO much to take from this book, from work ethic, to being masculine, finding your way, dealing with people, sex/girls, it’s just a great book )
A Life With Picasso by Francois Gilot (Written by the ONLY girl who survived Picasso and left HIM. She talks about her entire experience with Picasso, from meeting him the first time, to living with him, sex, friends, art, everything. It’s very intimate and Picasso was against the actual writing of the book because it was so intimate. He wanted to Gilot to wait until he died to release it, but she didn’t and it drove a massive stake into their relationship as a result.)
Documentaries.
(Not as good as the books BUT they are shorter and still give you a good general idea of the man)
The Power Of Art Picasso
(A general history of Picasso and his famous painting Guernica. This documentary is a good way to understand Picasso as the artist, not so much the man.)
Picassos’ Last Stand
(One of my favorites, this one talks about the last decade or so of his life and how Picasso rose from obscurity to having the greatest burst of creativity at the latest part of his years (He was 80.) It lasted for a decade and Picasso created more during those last 10 years, than any other time in his life.
Movies
The Mysteries Of Picasso 1956 (This is a great documentary film, it is basically an hour and a half of Picasso painting. You see his creative process, how he thought, and it’s just fascinating. I’ve watched this movie like 3 times already, there’s a lot to learn and a rare glimpse into how he worked.)
Surviving Picasso 1996 (This film shows Picasso’s charm, they really captured his person well. It’s a film seen through the eyes of his lover Francois Gilot. It’s just a good film, not too long and an interesting way of seeing what Picasso was actually like.)
There you go man, I hope this comment finds you well and helps in your own journey in understanding yourself and what it is like to be a man.
Cheers 🙂
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This is amazing, thank you so much. Super excited to get started on these. I appreciate all the help you’ve given, can’t wait to see what you’ll come up with on here.
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Definitely man, I greatly appreciate the support.
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At some point you realise that real self improvement involves leaving twitter and that those who say otherwise have a vested interest in you continuing to scroll.
But me, I’m not content with ‘content’. I want art, poetry, true literature. None of that can be created, or indeed mindfully consumed, if we are all scrolling and liking and retweeting all day.
I break down more of my thoughts on it here: https://thomasjbevan.substack.com/p/twitter-and-its-discontents
Anyway, best of luck mate. I salute you as you move on to bigger and brighter things in the wonderful world of REALITY.
Cheers,
Tom.
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